Time in a Bottle

I have found me.  What a strange thing to say when I have been me all along.  But the woman I have found within is stronger, more resilient.  I have found I can speak my mind.  I have found that I can be open to feelings and that when I show those feelings, it is OK.

Do you remember the song "Time In A Bottle" by Jim Croce?  Today, I felt like that.  Of I could put time In a bottle, I would want to spend every day with you.

No, not a person, well maybe...  But with me.

I have changed so much over the last 2 plus years....  But I have found that I have grown and the woman I have found, I want to spend time with.

Would I change anything?  No, well maybe, but then again, maybe not.  I found me.  A woman who is passionate and in some ways strong and others not so strong.  I found those who were true friends and have taken me into their lives - warts and all.  I have found those who only want to be friends if it is convenient.


I have found true friendship and in some cases love.  I have also found those who will use you.

I have a friend who is seeking more in life and I envy her for it.  She seeks the best in everything that happens around her and I strive to do that as well.

Life - it is different for each of us, but it really is worth living.

I look forward to the new year and I release my expectations of  people and what they do.  I will be open and enjoy the time I have.  I have saved those days - they mean a lot to me because the days have helped me grow and become who I am.

Love,
Forever and a Day...



If I could make days last forever
If words could make wishes come true
I'd save every day like a treasure and then,
Again, I would spend them with you

Where Did She Go?

She has changed.  She has grown.  She has retreated.  Where has she gone?

She experienced so much in a short period of time.

More than she had in her whole life.

She found what she didn't have, then,

She lost what she found.

Where did she go.

She experienced excitement, where it was missing

She saw wonder.

She found a small part of what it could be.

But where did she go?

She misses the life that was and what it could have been

And more importantly, what it could be.

Where did she go?

Do You Still Dream?

Yes, you.

Do you still dream?

Wake up in a moment and not know where you are?

 Have to check to make sure who you are with?

Caution yourself before you say a name?

Do you still dream of what could have been, might have been?

Do you still wake in the middle of the night wondering if I was dreaming too?

I still remember what it was like and how it felt.

I remember those thoughts and my heart pounding.

Do you still dream?

I remember what you taught me in those dreams.

How to live.

To be confident.

To care and love.

To dream of something better.

Do you still dream and remember like I do?

It's Been So Long For Me

I looked back and the last post was in March of this year.  It seems so much longer.

I have grown, changed, fretted, laughed and cried.

I can't believe where I was, where I am and where I'm going.  I have made friends, found others who were on the outside that are now in and have lost a dear, dear friend.

Yes, it has changed.  I have changed.  I have grown.

I am struggling to keep my new self and continue to grow.

I'm not sure where I will go, but I will continue on.

Love, Forever and a Day

It Was Real, Wasn't It

My last post was regarding a chapter of my life ending, but the story of my continuing.

Over the years, I have grown and changed.  I have experienced and had life moments that affect me and that could potentially affect others.  I have made good friends - those who you may not see every day, but you know are there for you no matter what.

Fast forward to the last 2 years - I have made some major changes in my life.  One that was totally unexpected, but was so needed.  I was encouraged to explore, change, grow and so many other things. 

Then -

Life

Happened


I miss what happened - although at times it tore me apart.  I still get the encouragement, but in different ways.  I miss the contact, bantering, fun.

It makes me wonder - was it real?  How did I get to that spot in my life, how did I change into what I became and while it changed me for the better, I miss the last part of my life and those that made such an impact.

It was real -

even for a short period of time and I will always treasure it and all it did for me.

Love, forever and a day

~ and yes, the story goes on